Prostitution and BDSM

It appears that there is a debate in Norwegian BDSM forums about the relationship between prostitution and BDSM. There are many views on this issue, and in my opinion, the debate has one big problem: what is prostitution? Well, prostitution is, in Norway, selling and buying sex. So what is sex?

The problem here is that it is currently not illegal to sell and buy sex. So seems not to be any clear definition about what prostitution enhances. A new law will be made soon that makes it illegal to buy sexual favours (selling it is apparently OK...), so hopefully an official definition will then be made.

As it is, sex is very unclear to those who discuss prostitution and BDSM in Norway. The reason for this is that some see prostitution as selling and buying genital/anal sex, while others see it as anything that could possibly be sexual. If two people are kissing and fondling, it's sex for some and just messing around for others, depending on the situation. So what about professional BDSM? Is it sex? Is a pro Domme selling sex when she is paid for whipping a butt, or for dressing a man up in a dress? Does a man buy sex when he pays a woman for making her make him lie under a table while she watches TV and chats with her friend on the phone? Is a pro Domme a prostitute when genitals are not involved? In my opinion: no! She's not a prostitute.

But there are those who do think she is a prostitute, because they see any form of BDSM as sex. As for me, I'm not having sex when I get my nails done, nor when I get a well deserved pedicure. And I'm not having sex when I make a guy walk around on his knees while I'm riding on his back and calling him 'pony', or having him on a leash to teach him tricks and calling him 'puppy'. Nor am I having sex if I for some reason spank his butt for being naughty. But others do seem to think manicure and pedicure is sex, if one person just happen to be dominating the other person. And it is prostitution if one of them pays the other.

I am not a pro Domme myself, but I know a few of them, and I read the blogs of several of them. And I don't have the impression that they are prostitutes. Yes, they are sex workers, but not prostitutes. If a pro Domme who does not sell genital sex is a prostitute, then a stripper must be one too!