How to find a Domme?

Ever since I first took my careful steps into the world of BDSM some three years ago, male subs have been sending me PMs asking "How can I find a Domme?" Why they ask me I can't even begin to imagine since I, with my only 23 years, don't have all that much experience with dating (and the experiences I do have are mostly of the negative sort).
Anyways, they do ask, and I sometimes even bother to reply (sorry guys, but since I've got better things to do than play I'm 'Ask Laura', I never guarantee a reply to something that doesn't really interest me). There is a book for the girls called The Kinky Girl's Guide to Dating, written by Luna Grey. It's a funny book, and there really should be one for the boys as well, so I wouldn't have to get all these questions (which I bet they've asked a gazillion other ladies as well!).

My good advise: Join online networks and participate in the forums. Write a good profile showing a bit of who you are, making you unique, and do NOT come across as anything near desperate. Sounding at least partly intelligent might be a good idea too ;-P Basically, what I mean is, don't write some crap like "30, M, sub, looking for strict Domme to give me hard discipline with a whip and fuck my ass with a strap-on." No, no, no... That's not even remotely intelligent, lad. Try something like:

"Hi! I'm (nick) and I live in (general area (tis' the Internet, so better not be too specific)). I'm (age) old and I'm (a student/working/etc). I consider my personality to be such and such. My interests are (insert the most important interests here). (Insert some more vanilla bla, bla, bla).

Within BDSM I'm a (sub/masochist/whatever). I became interested in this part of sexuality (time) ago, and I have (no/some/long/or more specific time) experience. For me, BDSM is (a spice in the bedroom with some kinky play now and then/a lifestyle/a way of self-realization/whatever).

I am currently looking for a Domme who is looking for a sub for (serious relationship/BDSM on a friendly basis/random play/whatever).

Cheers,
(nick)"

Note that this profile doesn't mention specific activities, most Domme's I know prefer talking about activities at a later time, when they know some more about the sub. Myself, and the Dommes I know, are more interested in what the person can offer as a person, regardless of BDSM. If we get interested in more than plain friendship we'll either bring the subject up ourselves or wait for the sub to do so (be careful to wait with that till you feel certain she is interested, and don't wait too long, so it's not a hard fall if you're not compatible at all).
However, if you're simply looking for random play, it might be a good idea to include the most important activities as well as your absolute levels.
Another point: If you're not single, say so in your profile! And also mention whether this is secret from your girlfriend/wife or if she knows and is OK with it (in that case, be prepared that some Dommes will require proof). Never, ever lie about this point! And don't excuse yourself with "My wife doesn't understand me", because we perfectly well know that really means "I've never told my wife about this and I'm too scared to tell her in case she'll kick me out."
And lastly: Make it personal, don't just follow this guide to the point, make it a presentation of you. And if you have any good quotes that says something you agree with, add it at the bottom. It could be from a philosopher, some sort of science or from literature, or even a poem.

Another way of meeting Dommes is becoming active in the BDSM societies. Go to a munch, a club, or some other place where kinky people meet up.
"But, I want this to be secret." Ah, but there's the choice you have to make. To find a Domme you usually need to meet people. Think about it. You might not meet a Domme at the munch or club, but maybe you talk to some other random people and they get a really good impression of you. Say these people just happen to know of a Domme who is single and/or looking for (a/another) sub, they just might mention you to this woman and introduce you to her at some point. Avoid asking people if they know someone who is looking for a sub, unless you know these people well and know they think well of you. If you're a stranger to them, chances are great that they won't tell you about that possible Domme. Generally, they probably won't send a complete stranger they know nothing about to their friend.
Also, being active and willingness to get to know people will show many of us that you are serious about this and not just another wanker or a man looking for someone to fulfill the fantasies his wife/girlfriend won't do.
And remember, most of the people in the scene are in the same shoes as you. Many have friends/family/colleagues and several other reasons not to let people outside know about their bedroom activities. That doesn't stop them from joining the scene. And many clubs have rules about not outing people and not revealing things about other members without their permission.

I'm sure there are things I've forgotten, but these are some random thoughts about the issue of dating.